Moving Forward While Looking Back

"You’ll learn, as you get older, that rules are made to be broken. Be bold enough to live life on your terms, and never, ever apologize for it. Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path. Laugh in the face of adversity, and leap before you look. Dance as though EVERYBODY is watching. March to the beat of your own drummer. And stubbornly refuse to fit in."-Mandy Hale

After a long absence from blogging, some of it a self-imposed banishment due to the lack of anything positive to say, and the fact that I had people nosing around that I wasn't willing to allow into my personal life. That being said, I am back. Slightly different than before, and in need of a desperate "reset".

I think my struggle to find anything of merit or value to say, has a lot to do with the fact that I have been carrying around baggage for far too long. The bitterness of a broken heart, failed relationships, bad dates, a lousy economy, and the perpetual feeling of working hard for nothing. Every time I logged into my blog, I had those reminders lurking in old posts and news feeds. It was time to revamp and start fresh.

While I cannot say that 2013 was a bad year, it wasn't a great year either. I feel like my life has been stuck in neutral, with me rushing through the valleys due to the pull of gravity. This has then been followed by the slow churn of making the next hill with barely any momentum. It is like trying to bike under water. Everything seemed out of place, and nothing seemed to work right.

While I say goodbye to the mediocrity of 2013, I am hoping for a great year in 2014. I am hoping that this is my year. The year of not only big changes, but a gain in momentum that has nothing to do with going through the motions of life. Rather I want the momentum in my life to be due to the fact that I am embracing life.

Embracing a single life, and finding contentment that I am turning 33 with no love in sight. That this is the year, where I am really okay to be single, and where I can acknowledge that life is good even as a single digit.

The new year, 2014, will be the year dedicated to seeking a life full of laughter, and truly appreciating the blessings and contentment that comes from a life well lived.

This is the year where:

1. I will stop looking back at failures with regret, rather I will treat them as lessons to be learned.
2. I will get back the body and health that I want, not because I will look better in the mirror but because I will feel better about myself.
3. I will learn to love myself instead of acting like I should be life's doorstep.
4. I will allow myself to make mistakes without beating myself up.
5. I will tell my family and friends that I love them more.
6. I will wake up each day knowing that the world is a better place because I am in it.
7. I will stop worrying about why I don't have a man, and instead realize that everything has its purpose and place. Even loneliness. 
8. I will embrace my flaws while working to overcome my weaknesses.
9. I will get my health under control.
10. I will laugh more.
11. I will drink more wine with friends.

This is a new chapter for me in my seven years of blogging, and hopefully a confident step in a better direction.

To my friends and readers who have stayed with me, asked me to blog again, and have encouraged me during my darkest hours....thank you.